


Concealing your crimes...

by Babbling



Category: A.C.E (Beat Interactive Band)
Genre: And the zombie dance pic, BK is a cutie, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Glitter, Heavy Angst, Inspired by sehyoon's glitter make up pic, M/M, Murder, One Shot, Sehyoon is the murderer, Violence, Wowkwan is cute too, only a bit wowkwan, why did i write this???, wowkwan, wowkwan are seriously so adorable in this I want to cry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-09-22
Packaged: 2020-02-10 22:27:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18669607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Babbling/pseuds/Babbling
Summary: AU in which Sehyoon is a make up artist during the day, but tries to hide a horrible secret in the darkness of the night.And he would do everything to prevent Byeongkwan from finding out about it...(Inspired by @sehnose and @lovingdonghun)





	1. In the shadows of the night...

**Author's Note:**

> Don't blame me, blame everyone on twitter 
> 
> This was a ride...I feel like I committed a crime myself now uff...
> 
> I hope you'll have fun anyways...there is more wowkwan then I originally planned :")

Sehyoon carefully put all his brushes, eyeshadows and other make up into a light blue bag, making sure it was closed properly, before he picked it up and went to quickly get a jacket and his phone from one of the chairs in his apartment.

He was late and he hated being late more than anything else.

He stepped out of his apartment and into the elevator, watching how the doors closed in front of him and formed a mirror in which he could see his own pale looking face. He hadn't gotten much sleep the night before and even all the time he, had put into his make up this morning hadn't helped to cover up that fact. Instead it had only made him run late and he already regretted his decision. At least his make up looked even prettier than usually, with soft gold-brown eyeshadow and some glitter around his eyes and on his cheekbones, which made him a bit less ordinary looking. He had a reputation to maintain after all.

The elevator reached the bottom floor with a quiet " _bing_ " and Sehyoon headed to his car. Even though it was only nine in the morning the sun was already burning down on him and when his skin touched the dark leather inside of his car, it felt like touching a hot stove.

He cursed and turned on the AC, enjoying the cool airstream on his face, before quickly getting on his way to his first client of the day.

In contrast to most days he didn't have to do the make up of more than one person at a time today and he really hoped this day would be less stressful than yesterday, when he had to do the make up of a whole boy group, consisting of 10 people.

Sehyoon sighed. He wasn't employed in an entertainment, because preferred to choose his own clients, so why did he still feel like he was doing the exact same work as all the other make up artists, he knew?

Still, he couldn't wait for the time, when the fashion week would return to Seoul. That would mean more fashion jobs for him and hopefully also more extraordinary make up looks he was able to try out. Maybe he would finally stop being bored then.

He wasn't far away from his destination anymore, when someone called him and he quickly picked up,

"Byeong-ah...what is it?"

"Hey, are you free this evening?" Sehyoon glanced at his phone, before he focused back on the street in front of him.

"I'm sorry...I have to work late today...why do you ask? Aren't you really busy too at the moment?" He could hear Byeongkwan sigh through the speaker.

"I am... that’s why I hoped I could spend some time with you again and relax...you have no idea...my office is a mess! I don't know, when I've slept properly the last time..." He sounded really exhausted and immediately Sehyoon felt guilt piercing through his heart.

"Is there still no clue about the murderer?" He wanted to know, slowly stopping in front of a red traffic light. "I mean wasn't it the third death already?"

"No..." Again, Byeongkwan sighed. "The guy is too clean...there is no camera footage, no foot- or fingerprints or anything else we could use...you know the only thing he leaves behind is--"

"Glitter, mixed with the blood of his victims...I know." Sehyoon ended the other's sentence, carefully placing his car in a parking space in front of a fancy looking apartment complex.

"You are really interested in that case, aren't you?" Byeongkwan stated but laughed softly and Sehyoon couldn't help but smile.

"Well what kind of person would I be to not be interested in the first real case of my boyfriend who got promoted to a police officer?" He could literally see the other turn red and grin proudly.

"I won't disappoint you then." He said with a firm voice, before he fondly added, "I love you, Sehyoon-ah." The older felt his heart start beating faster and his breathing go uneven, some more guilt making his way to his brain.

"I love you too..." He replied quietly, his voice sounding a bit hoarse and he quickly cleared his throat.

"Anyways, I have to hurry...my client is already waiting. See you soon!" With these words he hung up and calmed himself, before he made his way into the building. He was thirty minutes early but today would be a long day and he needed to check something.

* * *

 

"Can't you do it faster?!" The guy in front of him snapped, looking at him in annoyance, even though Sehyoon had told him to keep his eyes closed several times, while he carefully put eyeshadows on them.

"I'm nearly finished...please have some more patience."

"Patience?!" Again, the guy opened his eyes and Sehyoon quickly pulled away his hand since he would have destroyed his whole work otherwise. The man in front of him was probably younger than he himself and still he acted like an asshole...it was always the same with idols.

"Tell him!" He had now turned to his manager who was sitting some meters away from them and had been completely observed in his phone.

"Huh?"

"Tell him how busy I am!" When he started speaking, the manager looked tired but without any sympathy in his expression, this time his words directed at Sehyoon,

"We have a really tight schedule today. There are interviews in the morning, a fitting in the afternoon and then he has to practice for a concert which takes place tonight, so please hurry."

The young idol smiled satisfied. "My fans want to see me quickly too...So please make sure I look pretty."

Sehyoon felt anger boil inside of him. He wanted to scream that they weren't the only ones with a tight schedule and that he was doing his best, but instead he calmly bowed his head.

"I'm sorry..." He apologized and then kept on working, deciding to just simplify the look he originally had wanted to go for to save some time.

After 15 more painful minutes, he was finally done and said his goodbyes, again and again apologizing for something, he didn't feel guilty about even a bit. This hadn't been the first time that this had happened. He had done the other's make up a couple of times by now and there were many other idols who acted similar arrogant. Still...there was nothing to feel angry about. After all he wouldn't have to stick this out much longer.

"Till the next time!" Sehyoon said, not getting any reaction just like he had expected, before the door closed behind him. He quickly left the apartment complex again and only started smiling, when he was already driving on a busy street near his next client. The other would regret his behavior soon enough.

* * *

 

It was already getting dark outside, when Sehyoon had finished his last job and could finally put his heavy bag full of make up into his car trunk for good. He sighed relieved and stretched his arms over his head, before he observed his face in one of the mirrors that he always carried with him. His make up that had looked perfect this morning was slightly faded away and smudged but that wasn't too bad for such a long and exhausting day. He would definitely use this brand more often from now on.

Sehyoon smiled satisfied and once again got into the car, putting on some music and humming along to it, while he nearly automatically got onto a familiar route. There was something he had to take care of, before he could go home tonight.

It didn’t take him long to arrive at the apartment complex his first client of the day lived in. He parked his car some streets away and walked the rest of the way, covering his face with a black mask and his hair with a dark cap. Completed got his whole look with some, also black, leather gloves. Now, as long as he stayed in the dark shadows, he seemed to be nearly invisible and he loved that feeling. It gave him some sense of control that he could see everything, but the people passing him seemed to not even notice his presence. It made them…vulnerable, while he himself wasn’t.

After some minutes he eventually reached the building and he glanced at his clock, before he carefully observed the guardhouse. Just like he had expected it was empty since the guard usually left his spot at this time to go and make himself a new cup of coffee. It was something, Sehyoon had noticed that he did every day and it made the other’s plan a lot easier.

“They are all stupid…” He whispered and simply walked through the gate without anyone seeing or trying to stop him. He didn’t even need to care about the cameras since he had corrupted them a long time ago. The guard in charge would definitely get fired tomorrow, if not even worse and Sehyoon nearly felt something like sympathy for him, but then shrugged it of and focused back on his main intention.

Carefully, to stay hidden, he made his way towards the building, he had already entered this morning, and he had to admit that he felt a flesh of relieve, when he made it to the right door without meeting anyone. Sehyoon might already be experienced in this, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t still a risk…after all that was part of the fun.  

He carefully looked around one last time, before he entered the apartment as if he was the one living there.

The passcode hadn't changed since he had come to this place the first time and he didn't need to care about being too quiet, because he knew for sure that the apartment was empty. After all the idiot had been nice enough to tell him his exact schedule this morning and after some research Sehyoon had found out that the concert would end in about 10 minutes which meant he still had enough time to get into position, before the guy would come home.

He observed his surroundings searching for a good hiding spot, where he could stay until he was sure that his victim was alone. After some minutes he chose one of the many closets with winter clothes inside of them since the chance that someone would want to wear a winter coat in summer was pretty low. Then he waited and waited for what felt like hours until he could finally hear the noises of someone typing in a passcode and the door getting unlocked. It was time; show time.

Sehyoon peeked through a small gap between the doors of the closet and saw how the tired looking idol lazily kicked off his shoes and then walked into his apartment, throwing his bag onto one of the chairs in the process. He made his way to the kitchen, where he filled a glass with water and started drinking eagerly. It was obvious that he didn’t have the slightest clue that he was being watched. Now Sehyoon only needed to wait till the other fell asleep.

Luckily that didn’t take too long. The guy had settled down on the couch with some food only to fall asleep a short time after, still balancing a bowl on his knees.

Sehyoon smiled and pulled a sharp knife out of his bag, before he opened the closet and carefully stepped outside, to not wake the sleeping man. Not that the other would sleep much longer. Slowly he walked over to the couch, focusing on not making any noises, his heartbeat throbbing in his ears. Just some more centimeters, he could already look at the man’s face clearly…he just needed to get a bit closer and he would be able to grab him…

In that moment his foot bumped against a glass on the floor, it slid over the cold, smooth ground, before it tipped over and dashed into pieces with a loud noise. Sehyoon stopped, staring at the pieces in shock. He had just made a huge mistake.

“Wh…Who are you?! What are you doing in my house?!” The panicked sounding voice made him quickly look back at the idol who was starring at him with big, frightened eyes.

“Shit…” Sehyoon cursed, before he darted forward and roughly grabbed the other by his hair, holding the knife close to his throat. This definitely wasn’t as clean and elegant as usually, but it would work too...it had to. Maybe it would even be more fun like this.

“Don’t you know who I am?” He whispered into the other’s ear, his smile getting hidden by his mask. The young man froze, before his eyes grew even wider, fear but also confusion shining in them.

“You’re…the guy from earlier today…you…did my make up.” Sehyoon didn’t confirm this, but he knew that he didn’t need to. The idiot already looked like he was close to passing out from fear anyways and he had every reason to do so.

“What…what do you want from me? You can have everything! My money! Do you want my money?!” At this Sehyoon snorted disgusted.

“People like you always think it’s about the money…but guess what, even though I might just be some pitiful make up artist in your eyes who is not worth your time, I actually earn quite a lot money.” He loved the way in which the last bit of hope faded from the other’s eyes and how powerful it made him feel. He couldn’t get enough of this feeling since he had felt it the first time, after killing his father who had made him feel completely powerless through his entire childhood by abusing him again and again. Since that day he had sworn himself to always be the one in control instead of the other way around, but sometimes he simply needed a bit more…a special kick.

 “You are crazy! You’re a psycho!” Sehyoon rolled his eyes in annoyance.

“Call it whatever you want…Just know that you aren’t any better. Looking down on your fans and the people working for you, thinking that everyone is below yourself…you are just as disgusting as me.”

“Then do you want me to change?!” His victim sounded desperate, even tears gathering in his eyes. “I can change!  I’ll do better! Just please, let me go!” Sehyoon pretended to think about it for a moment.

“You promise to change?” The man nodded eagerly.

“Yes! Yes, I promise!”

“Really?” Sehyoon smiled again, it was fun playing with the other.

“Yes!”

“Then you should apologize for always being such an arrogant asshole first, don’t you think? I mean…what would your fans say?” By now the tears had started streaming down the young idols face.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! Please!” Sehyoon sighed.

“Ahh…too bad, you’ve already recognized me…I would have let you go otherwise you know, but there are people who can’t ever find out about this…” Sehyoon was just about to complete his work by cutting the other’s throat, so he could finally go home, when his phone went off. They both jumped startled, the knife slightly cutting the idols chin so that blood started running down his throat and he started whimpering quietly.

“Shut up!” Sehyoon harshly commanded him, whereupon the younger went silent immediately. Then he quickly put away the knife and took out his phone instead, while grabbing his victim’s hair even tighter, so he wouldn’t get any dumb ideas like trying to escape or something similar. However, when he saw Byeongkwan’s name on the display his heart seemed to stop. It was as if two worlds were colliding and for a short moment that fact overwhelmed his brain, before he slowly regained control and tried his best to look completely unaffected. Since there was no way that he could answer the call, he simply threw his phone onto the coffee table, waiting for the ringing to stop, while he focused back on his victim. The latter stared at the phone and then looked at Sehyoon with something like amusement and even though he didn’t want to admit it, it scared the older. The other should look frightened and beg for his life, not smile at him like this.

“Is that the one you were talking about? Byeongkwan…?” While speaking his name the younger’s eyes widened in something like realization, “No way…that can’t possibly be _Kim_ Byeongkwan? The police officer in charge of your case?!”

“No.” Sehyoon replied, but the second of hesitation, before he had answered, had already given him away and the idol’s smile grew even wider.

“Wow…he must mean a lot to you, I guess…but let me tell you, he’ll find out eventually about your crimes and then he’ll see your real character; a monster. After that he’ll leave you, but not without making sure that you’ll end up in prison…he’ll put you there with his own two hands and guess what else…he’ll be disgusted by you…” Sehyoon felt the blood rushing through his veins, anger and fear mixing into a deadly storm of emotions which was roaring so loud in his ears that it was hard for him to understand the other any longer.

“He’ll never find out…” He whispered, his voice sounding deeper than usually…more dangerous but now there were also doubts.  

“He’ll hate you…” However, Sehyoon had have enough and, before the other could even regret his words or stop smiling, he neatly cut through his throat, blood splattering his arms and gloves. Motionless he watched, how the puddle of blood around his victim grew bigger and bigger while he made disgusting noises, unable to speak any longer, his life slowly fading out of his body.

It didn’t take long until the man had completely stopped moving and breathing, which was Sehyoon’s clue to start with the last and most important part; he pulled out a small plastic box with red glitter inside which he then carefully sprinkled onto the fresh blood so that it sparkled in the dim light. In his opinion it made everything way less repulsive looking, glitter always did. Instead one could now go as far as call it art and it made him smile. He finally felt like he was in control again.

After he was done, Sehyoon quickly exchanged his dirty gloves for new, clean ones, and put them into a small plastic bag, adding his other dirty clothes as well. Then he quickly washed his face and the knife, before he put everything into his bag, quickly grabbed his phone and left the apartment, not looking back at the dead body on the couch even once. He would see enough pictures of the man on the news in the next weeks anyways.

Once again, he was lucky. Just like, when he had entered the building, he didn’t meet anyone and even, when he had to pass the guard, the latter was completely focused on watching a movie, not noticing him sneak past him. As soon as Sehyoon had made it to his car, he felt relieve wash over him and he took a deep breath to stop his fast beating heart.

Byeongkwan wouldn’t find out…Sehyoon would make sure of it. He could never let this happen and he would do everything to prevent it. After all the other was probably the best thing that had ever happened to him…. Receiving his love was something he had never even considered possible. Immediately the words of his victim came back to his mind,

_“He’ll be disgusted by you…he’ll hate you…”_

“No!” Sehyoon exclaimed and quickly got into his car, where he pulled out his phone and dialed his boyfriend’s number. While he waited for him to pick up, his emotions were a mess. This time he didn’t feel good and powerful like he always had after killing his other victims. This time there were only bad emotions like panic, nervousness and even something like guilt.

“Sehyoon-ah?” At the sound of Byeongkwan’s voice the storm inside of him immediately calmed down a bit.

“Byeong-ah, you called me?” He asked and tried to sound as casual as always, instead of as if he had just committed a huge crime, which was actually the case.

“Yes, I’m off duty for today and I wanted to see you…I know it’s late but I miss you.” Warmth spread through Sehyoon’s entire body at the imagination of the other’s pouting face. Feeling like this made him realize how cold he had felt the entire evening, without even noticing it and suddenly he wanted nothing more than to embrace his boyfriend and absorb even more of his warmth.

“I miss you too.” He replied and it was true…how much he missed him right now. “Should I come over?”

“YES!” Sehyoon could practically hear Byeongkwan smile. He chuckled, the storm inside of him slowly fading away.

“All right, I’m on my way.” He was just about to end the call, when something came to his mind, he couldn’t help but ask, “Byeong-ah…you don’t think I’m a monster…right?” There was silence for some moments and Sehyoon had probably never felt more nervous in his entire life, before Byeongkwan finally spoke up again,

“I don’t know where you got such an idea from but no, of course I don’t think, you are a monster. You’re my beautiful, cute boyfriend who sometimes even makes breakfast and brings it to my bed or surprises me with flowers and I love you. Is everything all right?“ Sehyoon hesitated, feeling tears gathering in his eyes. Once again, he realized that he didn’t deserve Kim Byeongkwan…that the other was way too good for him, but still he couldn’t let go of him. He indeed was a monster.

“No, everything is fine…I just had to watch this really sad drama with one of my clients…” He lied, his voice sounding hoarse and he quickly cleared his throat, before he added, “I love you too and I can’t wait to see you.” Byeongkwan laughed.

“All right, then. Hurry!”

In this night Sehyoon made a second promise to himself; he would do everything for Kim Byeongkwan and he would also do everything to make sure he would never find out about his dark secret… _everything._

 

_The end._ (or is it?) 


	2. Feeling like a monster in a fairy tale...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hoooo~  
> Just like I promised, here is another chapter of my fic (even tho it was supposed to only be a one shot but whatever)
> 
> You all must love being tortured... Anyways, have fun :"D

The next morning Sehyoon awoke in a warm, comfortable bed and the memory of how Byeongkwan and him had fallen asleep cuddled together the night before, made him smile happily and searchingly stretch out his hand for the other. However, the only thing he could feel were the empty, cold sheets next to him and immediately the happiness got replace by fear. Rapidly he opened his eyes, his heart starting to beat too fast in his chest. He sat up and hastily observed his boyfriend’s bedroom but the other was nowhere to be found.

“Byeong-ah?” Sehyoon called. No answer. He frowned. “Byeongkwan?!” He tried again but also this time he didn’t get an answer. Immediately he felt panic rise in him. What if something had happened? What if Byeongkwan had found out and was on his way to call for backup? What if he had left Sehyoon, because he had finally realized what kind of monster he actually was? More and more thoughts like that started piling up in his mind, making Sehyoon feel sick and he quickly stumbled out of the room, not caring that the apartment was cold and he only lightly dressed.  

“Byeong-ah?!” He called for his boyfriend again, hurrying through the corridors, while his brain made up more and more scenarios, one worse than the other.

“What is it?” At the sudden voice of Byeongkwan, relief washed over Sehyoon and he quickly walked towards the kitchen, where it had come from. The sight of his boyfriend standing at the oven, cooking some breakfast, while he was dressed in Sehyoon’s shirt which he had worn the night before, brushed off all his former horrible thoughts and seemed to make his knees go weak instead. He wanted to save this image in his head for forever and laugh, because of how glad he was that everything was like it should be, but instead there came only a weird noise out of his mouth. Surprised by it Byeongkwan turned around, looking at Sehyoon with a concerned frown.

“Is everything all right? You look pretty pale…” The older nodded and gulped, before he quickly closed the distance between them and pulled his boyfriend into a tight hug.

“I’m just worried for you…that’s all…you know with your job and everything.” At this Byeongkwan pulled away and eyed him with a serious expression.

“Did you have a nightmare?” Even though it wasn’t true, Sehyoon nodded and his boyfriend smiled softly, while he fondly stroked some hair out of his face.

“Are you worried that this guy who goes around and murders people could maybe try to kill me too? Because I’m trying to stop him?” Sehyoon stared at him, breathing suddenly feeling difficult. No, he did not think that…because he knew for sure that that would never happen…he might be a monster but he could never hurt Byeongkwan. Never. Still, he nodded again, not trusting his voice.

“Don’t worry, Sehyoon-ah. I can defend myself and I’m sure we’ll find the culprit soon.” The younger’s smile deepened, before he turned back to the food on the stove. However, Sehyoon couldn’t help himself, the distance between them feeling too big again, and he wrapped his hands around the other’s waist, back hugging him, while he buried his face in the crook of his neck.

“Whoa? What’s going on with you being so cuddly today? I need space to cook!” Byeongkwan complained but it didn’t sound annoyed at all and therefore the older didn’t take it as a clue to leave him alone. Instead he started peppering his boyfriend’s neck with small kisses and the other started laughing, the sound not only filling the small kitchen but also Sehyoon’s heart who wished they could simply stay in this moment forever. However, he had already had to learn at a young age that dreams didn’t usually come true and that was also applying to this situation.

Byeongkwan had just announced that he was done with cooking and that Sehyoon should get some bowls, when suddenly his phone went off and they both froze. The younger was that kind of person who used different ringtones for different people and the song which was now disturbing their peaceful silence, was the one he used for everything that was related to his work. Byeongkwan let out a loud sigh, not bothering to pick up the phone until he had placed the fresh food on the table.

“Why can’t I have a nice, peaceful morning, even, when I’m off duty?” He wanted to know, sounding annoyed, and walked over to one of the counters, to grab his phone. Meanwhile Sehyoon watched him, observing every change in his expressions, while he tried to look completely unbothered and not as if he knew exactly, why Byeongkwan was getting a call from work so early in the morning. They had found another dead body and Sehyoon was the one who had put it there. When Byeongkwan’s eyes widened in shock just some seconds later, Sehyoon knew that he had been right.

“What?!” His boyfriend exclaimed and started pacing back and forth uneasily in the kitchen. “All right…I’ll be on my way immediately.” With these words he hung up again, giving Sehyoon an apologetic look, while he hastily started dialing another number on his phone.

“Another victim?” Sehyoon asked and Byeongkwan nodded, adding an apologetic smile to his already apologetic expression.

“Apparently it’s someone pretty well known this time and that’s why they didn’t want to tell me his name. Anyways, I’m sorry but I have to quickly go there. But you should eat, before you leave for work. You can borrow some of my clothes too, if you want.” Sehyoon only nodded, while he watched how his boyfriend hurried out of the room to put on some different clothes, while shouting orders into his phone. Suddenly he hated himself for what he had done the night before. Not because he felt bad for his victim, but because it was his own fault that Byeongkwan needed to go to work now instead of spending his morning with Sehyoon.

“You idiot…” He whispered to himself, before he got up and put some of Byeongkwan’s food in boxes so that his boyfriend would at least be able to eat some breakfast as soon as he had enough time to.

The younger looked seriously touched by this, when Sehyoon handed him the food in a small bag some minutes later, after Byeongkwan had returned to the kitchen. He was now dressed in his police officer uniform and Sehyoon had to admit that he found his boyfriend way too good-looking in it, considering the fact that he was a searched criminal.

“Awee…” Byeongkwan cooed, taking the bag from Sehyoon not without taking a quick glance into it. “I really do have the cutest boyfriend in the entire world…” He smiled, before he sighed. “I’m such a lucky man…” Sehyoon returned the smile, but he knew that it probably looked a bit forced. If Byeongkwan knew what he really was…he would never have said such things and that was why he could never let him find out.

He escorted Byeongkwan to the door, where they both hugged each other.

“I’m so sorry that I have to leave you again already. You know if I could, I would spend way more time with you…” His boyfriend apologized again and Sehyoon only hugged him tighter.

“Every second, I spend with you is a present and even if it isn’t much…I don’t care as long as I can see you for some minutes.” He pressed a kiss to Byeongkwan’s temple and they both broke away from each other again. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Sehyoon-ah. Now go and eat or the breakfast will get cold. I’ll call you!” With these words Byeongkwan left and Sehyoon went back to the kitchen, an uneasy feeling having replaced his former appetite.

* * *

 

The rest of the morning passed by without any further incidents. Byeongkwan didn't call Sehyoon nor did anyone try to capture and drag him to the police station. Instead Sehyoon went to work and painted art piece after art piece onto the faces of idols, models or people that were rich enough to be able to pay for someone like him, aka a make-up artist. However even though he usually loved his work and started to forget everything around him once he began doing somebody's make up, that wasn't the case today. Instead he felt uneasy and nervous, his thoughts wandering to Byeongkwan and the question what he was doing right now again and again.

In his lunch break, he sent a message to his boyfriend, telling him not to skip meals, even, while he was working hard, only to not eat anything for lunch himself since he still wasn't feeling hungry. Instead he used the time to drive to an abandoned junkyard on the outskirts of Seoul, where he buried everything that could lead him to the murder under a big pile of junk. Till now, nobody had ever found his hiding place and he hoped it would stay this way.

When he checked his messages a while later, he saw that Byeongkwan still hadn't replied and he knew that he must be extremely busy...too busy to even eat.

Sehyoon thought about, if he should just drop by his station and force him to stomach something, but then he decided against it. They were searching for him after all and what if Byeongkwan maybe didn't want him to show up at his work place? Maybe his colleagues didn't even know about him and their relationship...maybe his boyfriend would be ashamed...

The following rest of Sehyoon's work day was long and exhausting, but he didn't mind. It kept him occupied and at least distracted him to some part of all the doubts and negative thoughts that didn't want to leave him alone and constantly tried to get his attention.

"Ahhh...finally..." He sighed after he had eventually made it home and let himself fall onto his sofa. He checked his messages again, but Byeongkwan still hadn't replied. It was already past ten and he begun to worry. Hopefully he wasn't overworking himself and remembered to get some breaks and rest. At that thought Sehyoon nearly started to laugh.

He knew exactly that Byeongkwan was probably doing the complete opposite of it, being too observed in the wish to catch the criminal and bring an end to the murders.

He sighed. If there was just something, he could do to lighten his boyfriend's burden, but everything he could do, would end with Sehyoon outing himself as the murderer and their relationship to get destroyed.

Suddenly he felt something next to him vibrate and he frowned, searching for the object with his hands. It turned out to be his phone and when he saw Byeongkwan's name on the display he hastily picked up.

"Byeong-ah? Finally! How are things? Are you home now?" Sehyoon wanted to know, but his boyfriend didn't answer any of his questions.

"Yoon-ah...can I come over?"

"Now?" Sehyoon asked surprised and glanced at the clock which showed that it was already nearly 11pm. However, Byeongkwan's voice sounded strange, not as carefree and happy as usually and therefore he agreed. Not that he was able to tell the other no anyways.

"Where are you right now? Still at the station?" His boyfriend didn't answer immediately.

"I'm...I'm actually in front of your house already. Can I come in?"

"Oh uhh...of course!" He said and jumped up, letting his eyes wander over the messy state of his apartment. How was he supposed to clean all of this in a matter of five minutes?

"Okay...I'll be there soon." With these words Byeongkwan hung up and Sehyoon started racing through his apartment in panic. He grabbed magazines, clothes and plates on his way, throwing them, where they actually belonged or just kicked the stuff under the sofa. It wasn't even that messy but books about blood circulation and the human body could look suspicious enough considering what was going on at the moment and the fact that Sehyoon had never shown any interest in such things in front of Byeongkwan till now. He had just managed to let his last book disappear in the closet which he usually stored his shoes in, when the ringing of his doorbell signalized that Byeongkwan was already standing in front of his apartment. He felt his heart speeding up and observed his now clean living room one last time, before he turned around and hastily opened the door.

"Hi..." His boyfriend greeted him weakly, when he appeared in the corridor, looking exhausted.

"Hi. Do you want to come in?" It was a stupid question, but Sehyoon suddenly didn't know what else to say. It was the first time that Byeongkwan was visiting his apartment and for some reason that fact made him feel extremely nervous. The younger didn't reply anything, only slowly stepping inside and everything about how he was acting literally screamed at Sehyoon that something was off.

He had just closed the door behind his boyfriend again and was turning around to ask, what exactly was going on, when Byeongkwan suddenly pressed his body against his, hugging him tightly, while burying his head in the crook of his neck. It took Sehyoon some seconds until he returned the hug, being too surprised by the sudden actions of the other.

“Is everything all right?” He eventually asked quietly, only to feel something cold and wet running down his neck. The realization that Byeongkwan was crying hit him and panic rose in him, while he started to comfortingly stroke his boyfriend’s back and hair. Sehyoon had never seen the other cry before and it made him feel helpless.

“Hey, baby, talk to me. What is it? Maybe I can help you…” He tried to calm Byeongkwan down since the latter had started sobbing by now and the sounds made Sehyoon’s heart ache. If he could take whatever pain Byeongkwan was feeling right now away from him and be the one feeling it instead, he would do it immediately.

“I’m— I shouldn’t tell you anything about…the investigation but—” His boyfriend eventually started talking, the sobs still shaking his entire body, “The new victim he…he was still so young! A child! Yoon-ah, he was younger than me!” He made a sound like a wounded animal and Sehyoon flinched, feeling like his heart was getting torn apart.

“He was a young idol who had a lot of fans and there were so many things, he should have been allowed to experience, but now…he’ll never get the chance. And his parents…” Another sob shook Byeongkwan’s entire body, making him unable to speak for some seconds, “Telling his parents was the worst…”

Sehyoon kept on stroking his boyfriend’s hair, feeling how his t-shirt got soaked in the younger’s tears, while he felt guilt creeping through his body, making him feel worse than ever. This all was his fault. He was the reason for Byeongkwan’s sorrow and for the first time he also thought about the other people he had hurt by murdering the young idol. The entire time he had only seen his own desire to feel more powerful again and how rude the other had acted towards him, but he had never thought about his victim’s parents or young age which often got accompanied by immature behavior.

“He is in a better place now…” Sehyoon only mumbled lamely, but for some reason that seemed to comfort Byeongkwan, because he felt him nodding and then slowly calming down again.

“You…are right. Wherever he is, it’s definitely better than a cruel world like this…” The younger took a deep breath, before he broke away from his boyfriend again, his eyes still red and puffy from crying.

“Whoever killed this innocent boy is a monster…” Sehyoon tried his best to cover up his flinch at the word _monster_ , by running a hand through his hair, while nodding in agreement. After all, Byeongkwan wasn’t wrong, even though that fact hurt.

“But don’t worry…” His boyfriend continued, suddenly having a determined expression on his face, “This was the last case, I’ll make sure of it. We finally got a witness so it’s only a matter of time until we’ll find the culprit.” Sehyoon’s eyes widened in shock, panic racing through his entire body.

“There was a witness?!” He exclaimed and his voice sounded too shaky in his ears, even though he tried to hide how much this information scared him. Byeongkwan only nodded, seemingly still too occupied with his own feelings and thoughts to notice his boyfriend’s uneasiness.

“That’s great!” The older quickly added in the hope to at least sound a bit convincing. “Finally! Wasn’t he always so clean the other times? What happened?” At this Byeongkwan suddenly froze and looked at him with a frown, before he slightly shook his head to seemingly clear his mind.

“I don’t know…but apparently one of the guards had seen a stranger enter the building not too long, before the murder must have happened. We didn’t hear his complete statement yet and he said it was very dark but I’m sure, he’ll be a huge help for our investigation.” He smiled at Sehyoon, new hope shimmering in his eyes. “Isn’t that great?”

Sehyoon nodded, forcing himself to smile, while he cursed himself for having made such a huge mistake like someone seeing him sneak inside the building. This could mean the end of everything.

“It’s…it’s amazing!”

“It is, but don’t tell anyone about this! I actually wasn’t allowed to tell you either, but I know I can trust you.” At this and at the way Byeongkwan smiled at him with so much love and trust, Sehyoon felt tears rise to his eyes. Once again, he realized that the younger was too good for him and that he didn’t deserve him even a bit.

“I promise.” Sehyoon mumbled and looked at his beautiful boyfriend for some more seconds, before he couldn’t hold back any longer and stumbled forward, pressing his lips onto Byeongkwan’s who returned the kiss slightly surprised but still passionately. Like this Sehyoon was able to bury all his guilt and fear under all the better emotions that his boyfriend never failed to make him feel. It was as if Byeongkwan was a drug, he desperately needed, and he couldn’t live without anymore. And just like every other addict, Seyhoon would do everything to be able keep on taking it.

Still, later, when they were lying in Sehyoon’s bed, Byeongkwan’s body closely pressed to his own one, he wasn’t able to sleep. The fear of getting found out and losing the other was too great and he knew there was only one thing, he could do; he needed to commit another murder. His last one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh...well...aren't wowkan cute? Too bad that Sehyoon is a freaking psychopath :) Seriously, why am I writing this???
> 
> Anyways, I hope you had fun :"D this work will probably have 4-5 chapters and I don't know how long updating will take me since I'm gonna be pretty busy again soon...and I'm also lazy...and writing on other stuff as well hahah 
> 
> \--------
> 
> If you want to follow me on Twitter, you can do that [here](https://twitter.com/Babbl1ng) uwu~


	3. You can't hide in the shadows for forever...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finished writing this only yesterday but I couldn't wait to show it to you guys <3
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy, you decided to read this yourself after all^^

Sehyoon knew, he had to act as quickly as possible. Since the guard was the only witness in a crime case which had seemed unsolvable till now, that meant that they would questioning him as soon as possible, while keeping security guards around him all the time for his protection. After all he was extremely valuable and they knew that, if a word about the existence of the witness would come out, the murderer would come for him in the try to cover up his traces. And that was exactly what Sehyoon was about to do.

Quietly, to not wake Byeongkwan who was still peacefully sleeping next to him, Sehyoon got up, carefully loosening his boyfriend’s hands that were still holding his arm. Another wave of guilt hit him, while he watched Byeongkwan sleep for some more seconds, seemingly unable to take his eyes off him, before he sighed and wanted to eventually leave the comfortable warmth of his bed. However, he had only placed his feet onto the cold ground, ready to get up, when he suddenly felt Byeongkwan reaching for his hands again. Sehyoon tensed and then turned around, looking at his boyfriend who was blinking at him sleepily.

“Where are you going? It’s still dark outside…” He wanted to know, his voice still sounding hoarse from sleep. Quickly Sehyoon forced himself to smile, his free hand carefully caressing the other’s soft cheek.

“I have to go to work earlier today. Don’t worry about me and get some more sleep. There should still be some food left in the fridge and I’ll be back soon. If something happens, just call me.” He whispered, suddenly feeling the urge to hug Byeongkwan and never let go of him again. But he couldn’t do that, so he only quietly said, “I love you” followed by his boyfriend softly humming, before he fell asleep again, his hand leaving Sehyoon’s.

The latter looked at him one more time, for some reason feeling his heart aching.

“I’m sorry…” He whispered. Then he finally got up and left, making his way to the junkyard, where he picked up his hidden bag that contained all the things, he would need. Right now, he was no longer Sehyoon, but a monster which desperately tried to save a world, it shouldn’t have known in the first place. 

* * *

 

Just like he had expected, the apartment, the guard lived in, wasn’t left unprotected. Just like last time, Sehyoon had parked his car some streets away and then walked to his destination by foot, so he could easily check out the circumstances without getting discovered. It was still early in the morning, even the sun not having set yet, and that meant Sehyoon was able to hide in the shadows just how he liked to. He had also quickly discovered the two police guards, sitting in one of the cars in front of the building and looking extremely bored. He smiled. It would be easy to sneak past them without them noticing him. One of the guys seemed to not be able to stop yawning and the other was looking at something in his lap, probably his phone. It kind of annoyed Sehyoon that his boyfriend had worked so hard for this, only for his work to be destroyed, because his collogues were incompetent. Still that fact also made Sehyoon’s plan easier, so he didn’t want to complain.

Carefully, to not be seen, he put on his leather gloves. Then he waited for the right moment to sneak into the building and he wouldn’t have to wait for long. Suddenly one of the two cops got out of the car and walked away into the direction of a store, probably to buy some food or coffee. Meanwhile his partner stayed behind but without the other being present there seemingly wasn’t anything left to keep him awake any longer and soon he was asleep, his head turned into the other direction.

Now or never, Sehyoon thought and quickly made his way over the street and into the save shadows of the apartment complex. He wouldn’t be as clean as all the other times, but there was not enough time to manipulate all the cameras. He would have to simply try to hide his face as much as possible and avoid every camera, he could.

Because of that it took him longer to finally get to the door of the witness, where he found himself in front of another hurdle; he didn’t know the code for the door. Still something like this wouldn’t stop him. He glanced at his phone, realizing that he would have to hurry to be back in time without it getting suspicious. Quickly he pulled out his boyfriend’s police cap which he had borrowed earlier as a plan B, placing it in on his head. Sehyoon had no idea if this would work, after all he didn’t know if the guard had seen his face or only his back, but he had no other option than finding out about it now.

He took a deep breath, glancing at his phone again, but this time to take one last look at his background picture which was Byeongkwan’s smiling face. He had taken the photo four months ago, shortly after they had started dating and the younger had forced him to visit the local zoo. Sehyoon still remembered clearly how excited Byeongkwan had watched all the different animals and even tried talking to them. He had reminded Sehyoon more of a child than the adult who had gotten promoted to be an officer not much later and that day had probably been the day on which Sehyoon had completely fallen in love with Byeongkwan. Something which seemed to be a one-way trip. He gulped, feeling his hands shaking, while he put away his phone again and pressed the doorbell. Sehyoon was doing this for Byeongkwan’s and his future…it was the only thing, he could do. But even though he repeated this in his head again and again, it didn’t silence the other small voice that told him that his boyfriend wouldn’t want him to do this…that it would hurt him worse than anything.

The doubts returned with full force, but before Sehyoon could change his mind, a voice suddenly sounded through the speaker,

“Yes…Who are you?” Sehyoon slightly flinched startled at this, but quickly pulled himself together again.

“I’m one of your guards and I just quickly wanted to check if everything is all right.” He then lied, the words rolling of his tongue without any hesitation. He knew that he sounded convincing, after all he had practiced lying all his life. There was a pause, before the witness answered,

“Yes…everything is all right. Thank you for your hard work, if you don’t mind, I’ll go back to sleep now.” Sehyoon nodded, having expected something like this already, before he suddenly put on an apologetic smile.

“I need to return to my work too, but could I just use your toilette for a second? It’s really urgent and the staff in the store doesn’t want to let me use theirs.”

“Ohh…” The man sounded obviously taken aback, hesitating before he finally answered again,

“It…it must be hard…uhhh…sure. Come in.” At this Sehyoon wanted to grin. He hadn’t thought that it would be this easy. However instead he only smiled relieved.

“Thank you so much, you are my savior.” He carefully reached for the knife in his pocket, the feeling of its cold handle chasing away all his leftover doubts. He needed to do this, so he would.

In that moment the door got opened, an elderly man in a pajama appearing behind it. He looked clearly surprised to see that Sehyoon wasn’t only not wearing a police uniform, but was holding a knife in his hand instead. However, he didn’t even have time to scream, before Sehyoon pushed the knife into his chest at the side of his heart, while moving both their bodies back inside the apartment so that the door could close shut behind them. Like this they stumbled through the short corridor, until the man’s body got stopped by one of the walls. Sehyoon didn’t like killing like this. It wasn’t a simple clean cut, but took an eternity and by the time the man finally sank to the floor, while disgusting pained sounds escaped his mouth, Sehyoon was completely covered in blood too. He groaned annoyed, thinking about how and where he should clean himself, so that Byeongkwan wouldn’t see anything, while he ignored the half-closed eyes of the guard who was staring at him in desperation.

“Please…help…” He still somehow managed to get out, but Sehyoon only rolled his eyes. Why should he try to kill his victims only to save them afterwards and go to jail for it anyways?

“There is no use in begging…” Sehyoon just replied, his voice sounding completely emotionless. It was weird…usually he felt euphoric and powerful after killing someone, but right now there was simply nothing… He quickly glanced at his slowly dying victim, before he started wiping the blood from his face and clothes as much as possible.

“Why…?” The man spoke up again and Sehyoon had to admit that he was impressed by how strong the other was. Most people would have completely passed out by now, if not even already died. Maybe that was the reason, why he suddenly found himself actually giving him a proper answer,

“It’s nothing personal…You just happened to be the only witness and usually I wouldn’t care, but since a while ago I have someone in my life who can never find out about this…and you being alive was too big of a risk…sorry.” He had no idea why he added the lame apology at the end of his explanation. Sehyoon had never apologized to his victims ever before, but at the thought of how sad Byeongkwan would be about the guard’s death later today, he felt honestly bad.  Again, the man opened his mouth and Sehyoon slightly raised his eyebrows, before he leaned a bit closer. After all one shouldn’t ignore somebody’s last words. It took the other some attempts and coughs but eventually he finally managed to speak his two last words,

“Too…late…” Sehyoon was still trying to figure out, what exactly he meant by that, when he could suddenly hear the sound of somebody typing in the passcode. Seyhoon didn’t even have enough time to curse the man who had seemingly known who he was the entire time and called for help earlier, before the door got ripped open and the noise of someone running towards them echoed through the corridor. It gave away that there was only one person and Sehyoon slowly closed his eyes to compose himself. Seemed like he had one more victim than planned after all.

He was just about to turn around and use the moment of surprise to quickly kill whoever had come for help, when the person spoke up with a loud and demanding voice and it made Sehyoon’s blood freeze,

“Let the knife fall to the floor, turn around and put your hands over your head or I’ll shoot!” Sehyoon stopped breathing, his eyes widening in shock, while panic rushed through his entire body. This wasn’t possible! This couldn’t be!

“I said, let your knife fall and turn around!” The other repeated his orders again, even louder, and Sehyoon immediately felt his fingers letting go of the knife, before it fell to the floor, clattering loudly. “Now turn around!” But he didn’t…he simply couldn’t. There was no way that he could face him.

“I said, TURN AROUND! Or I’ll shoot and don’t you think these are just empty threats, because then you’ll have to find out that they are not, pretty soon. There is no way that I’ll let you escape…not after everything you’ve done!” At this Sehyoon slowly nodded, preparing himself for what was about to happen.

“I know…” He then said, before he finally turned around and was met by the face of Byeongkwan who looked at him in utter horror.

“No…” was the first thing the other got out after what seemed to have been hours and it sounded like the whimpering of a hurt animal. Sehyoon knew immediately that he had never felt worse in his entire life, not even, when his mother had died at the hands of his father and he then had forced Sehyoon to lie to the police, so that he ended up not getting punished for it. Seeing Byeongkwan looking at him with so much pain, confusion and disappointment, however, was way worse, because suddenly Sehyoon realized that he had become as much of a monster as his father had been.

“Nooo!” Byeongkwan exclaimed again, but this time a bit louder, “This can’t be! This is…this is not right! This must be a bad dream because how…how can you be here…” His voice was full of despair. It was the voice of someone who knew exactly what was going on, but simply refused to believe it. Byeongkwan looked at him with big desperate eyes like he was waiting for Sehyoon to tell him a lie that would explain all of this and make it possible for them to just go back to their normal lives afterwards. However, there was no such lie and therefor Sehyoon simply kept silent, watching in pain how the heart of his boyfriend broke right in front of his eyes.  

“But…you are a make up artist. You don’t like zoos because you hate that the animals are locked up instead of being free and you cooked dinner for me even, when it was already past midnight, when I came home. You…You—” A sob escaped Byeongkwan’s mouth and forced him to stop talking for some seconds, before he continued quietly, “You are my boyfriend…”

Suddenly Sehyoon couldn’t take it any longer, his heart hurting just as much as the younger’s and he wanted nothing more than to comfort him.

“Byeongkwan I—” But he should have known that it was too late. God, it had already been too late, when they had started dating in the first place, without the other knowing that Sehyoon was a murderer. If he had known, he wouldn’t have ever looked at him with so much love or hugged him, whenever he had felt exhausted from work. No, he would have looked at him like he was doing it right now, with distant, cold eyes which were full of disgust.

“ _Don’t_ …call my name ever again!” He exclaimed, rising the gun in his hands back to its original position, after he had lowered it in confusion and shock earlier. “Don’t think, I won’t shoot you just because—” He stopped in the middle of the sentence, angrily blinking away some tears. “You are a monster…”

“I know…” Sehyoon said quietly and he saw how Byeongkwan flinched at him agreeing to his statement. “I won’t blame your for handing me over or even shooting me…so…do it!”

Byeongkwan stared at him, his brows furrowed in a mix of indecision and despair but also anger. He had just opened his mouth to say something, when suddenly the muffled noises of sirens made their way to them. The backup had arrived. Sehyoon immediately felt the need to run away, his eyes glancing at the door behind Byeongkwan; his only way out. Then he looked back at the younger who was still watching him, without taking his eyes off him for even a second.

Slowly Sehyoon stepped forward, directly returning his boyfriend’s stare, while not even daring to blink. Carefully, to not miss any movements or signals from Byeongkwan, he closed the distance between them, seeing vaguely how the gun was now nearly touching his throat, before he passed him and slowly made his way towards the door.

“You can’t leave! I’ll shoot you! I’m serious…I…” But the rest of the sentence got replaced by the sound of Byeongkwan sobbing. Meanwhile Sehyoon walked out of the apartment freely, but with an aching heart and the knowledge that he had just lost the only source of light in his otherwise so dark life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy suffering~ <3
> 
> I mean...I warned you all and I think it was clear from the beginning that there would be heavy angst hahah
> 
> Anyways I don't usually promote my other fics here but I just posted the first chapter of my new wowkwan ff and if you are still searching for a new A.C.E ff to ready it would make me very happy, if you could give it a try. It's about Byeongkwan who finds out that he is a wizard (but doesn't believe in such things at all) and then gets forced to attend a "wizarding school" and honestly I love this story so much hahah (I planned a lot and the plot is way better than it sounds, I swear haha)  
> So if you are interested you can find the ff [here ("Incantatio")](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19190164/chapters/45618586) (pls give this ff some love...I worked so hard :"))
> 
> That's it for today, there are only 1-2 chapters left for this ff so look forward to them even tho I don't know, when I'll be able to upload them :)
> 
> Byee~
> 
> My Twitter: [@Babbl1ng](https://twitter.com/Babbl1ng) (let's fangirl together uwu)


	4. What stays is nothing...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :")
> 
> Ahh also...I tried to inform myself a bit about yk law and stuff but honestly...I never liked that subject in school...no I hated it (which seriously isn't good if you are writing ffs like this one) so idk if what I'm describing here makes any sense (I got most of it from kdramas lol...I'm educated yk^^) Feel free to correct me if you know more about this subject tho uwu

It probably wasn't the best idea to drive straight home after having barely escaped getting arrested by nobody else than your boyfriend, but Sehyoon honestly didn't care. The rest bit of self-preservation that had made him sneak past the arriving police earlier was gone. What stayed was a dull emptiness.

Sehyoon hadn't cried, hadn't screamed or done anything similar. Instead he had driven home calmly, where he had gotten rid of his blood-stained clothes and the knife. Then he had sat down on the sofa and stared at his wall, waiting for the police to knock on his door at any minute. However, hour after hour had passed without anything happening.

It confused Sehyoon. Byeongkwan had recognized him for sure, so why wasn't there anyone searching for him?

Slowly, for the first time in what seemed and eternity, he got up to walk over to the table, on which he had carelessly thrown his phone. For some seconds he hoped that Byeongkwan had maybe tried to call or text him but of course that wasn't the case. The only calls, he had gotten, were from angry clients that wanted to know why he wasn't showing up to their appointments. Not that any of this still mattered.

Sehyoon opened his browser and took a look at the news sites only to frown in surprise and confusion. There were indeed new articles about the fact that the guard had died, however, there was neither a direct mentioning of Sehyoon as the murderer nor the request to keep looking for him and a description of his looks.

"But...that's...that doesn't make any sense..." Sehyoon mumbled, still confused, when suddenly realisation hit him. But that didn't make any sense either...there was no way that Byeongkwan hadn't told them about their meeting. Not after with how much disgust he had looked at Sehyoon. Still the longer the older thought about it, the clearer it became that there was no other possibility. Even after everything that had happened, Byeongkwan still hadn't betrayed him. It once again showed just how much of a better person than Sehyoon he was and the unbearable feeling of guilt from earlier hit him again.

It made his composed mind drown in chaos and, before he really knew what he was doing, Sehyoon stumbled into his bedroom, his eyes immediately falling on his unmade bed which they both had slept in not even a full day ago. He looked at it for some seconds, before he made his way towards it with shaky legs. They gave up under him as soon as he had reached the bed and, when he fell into the soft covers, Sehyoon immediately noticed Byeongkwan's smell. It wasn't overpowering but he had always loved it more than anything else and smelling it made the last bit of in him self-control disappear.

The tears started to fall and sob after sob escaped his mouth, while he buried his face in Byeongkwan's pillow. The most important thing; his whole future, was gone and it was his own fault. This not being enough Sehyoon had hurt Byeongkwan, the only human he had cared about more than himself. He had always been selfish and because of that he hadn't been able to stop himself, even though he had always known that he wasn't good enough for Byeongkwan. The boy who had always carried so much light and love in his heart and had even managed to touch Sehyoon's own dark and rotten one. Now Sehyoon was paying the price for it and it made him cry like a child that had just lost its mother.

The sudden vibrating of his phone was the thing that made him stop crying. As if someone had pulled a switch, the tears stopped falling, while Sehyoon stared at the display which showed that an unknown number was calling him. Who could that be? Had the police found out about him after all? But why should they call him then?

"It doesn't matter anymore anyways..." He tiredly mumbled to himself, before he accepted the call.

At first there was nothing except silence which confused Sehyoon even more. Maybe someone had called the wrong number? Or was it the police after all?

He was just about to quickly end the call again, new doubts and fears piling up in him, when he suddenly heard a whimpering. At first, he thought he had misheard it, but then there was another sound and another one until they turned into sobs. Sehyoon stared at his phone with wide eyes, confused about what was going on, when finally a voice spoke up and turned the older's stomach upside down. He would have recognized it anywhere.

"I...I can't do it..."

"Byeongkwan!" Sehyoon exclaimed, feeling how his own tears came back. Byeongkwan was calling him! Byeongkwan who hadn't betrayed him. New hope was rising in Sehyoon. Maybe the other would listen to him, maybe Sehyoon could at least explain himself.

"Byeongkwan, please listen to me I—"

"I don't want to listen to you!" The younger interrupted him and like that destroyed Sehyoon's new gained hope. "You... you destroyed everything!" Byeongkwan screamed, sounding furious. "How could you do something like this even though you knew, I was trying to find you?! That I was trying to stop all of this?! You are a monster but why..." Byeongkwan's voice failed and Sehyoon could hear another sob that made his heart clench, "Why is it still impossible for me to tell anyone? I should be the one to put you in jail but just thinking about it feels like my heart gets ripped in apart." At this Byeongkwan laughed dryly and without any humor in it,

"Isn't it funny? As a police officer I should think that you are a monster, because you killed all those people, but instead I hate you, because you made me fall in love with you first..." Again, his voice got interrupted by a sob and Sehyoon felt how his own tears started falling. Byeongkwan had every reason to hate him. 

"I'm...so sorry..." He whispered, his voice sounding hoarse, and he really meant it. "If I could go back in time, I would change it..."

"But you can't..." Byeongkwan stated and Sehyoon took a deep shaky breath, while his eyes wandered to the picture of his mother that was standing on his nightstand. "You can't change the past and the people that died because of you will forever stay dead..."

"I know..." The older whispered, but Byeongkwan simply ignored him.

"They are dead and it's your fault!"

"I know!” Sehyoon exclaimed, feeling desperate. “Tell me what to do! Whatever you want, I will do it. I can disappear…you won’t ever see me again! Or you can just arrest me. I swear, I won’t try to run away again.” There was a moment of silence, before the younger spoke up again,

“No…I want you to turn yourself in…I want you to show up at the police station by tomorrow and to admit to your crimes and face the consequences. That’s the only way, I won’t lose even the last bit of respect, I still have for you. And if you try to run away again then just know that I won’t stop until I’ll find you and make you pay for everything you’ve done!” His voice sounded completely calm without any of his former emotions in it, "If there was ever a even a small part in you that truly loved me, then you will follow my orders."

With these words the younger ended the call. Afterwards Sehyoon simply kept on sitting on his bed, not even moving a finger while thousands of thoughts were rushing through his mind. There were millions of scenarios playing in his head but he knew that there was only one possible decision for him to make. He would turn himself in, just like Byeongkwan wanted him to.

 

* * *

 

 

That night Sehyoon didn't get any sleep. Not that he had even tried to. What use was there in sleeping? What use was there in doing literally anything?

He felt like there were no feelings left in him, while he slowly got dressed and then started his car to make his way to the police station, all the evidences leading to him being the murderer still in the trunk of his car.

It was as if he had turned from a monster into a robot. The storm of emotions and thoughts from the night before had calmed down and what stayed was nothing.

Sehyoon parked in front of the building and when his eyes fell on Byeongkwan's car, already standing some spots in front of him, it was the first time since their call that his heart started hurting again. Like always the younger seemed to be the only thing that made him actually feel something.

He took a deep breath, before he got out of the car and grabbed his bag that still had some blood on it. Sehyoon hadn't bothered to clean it. This would make it a lot easier for Byeongkwan and his team to proof that he was the actual murderer without the younger having to tell them about their relationship and meeting. The last thing he wanted was for Byeongkwan to get in trouble or feel uncomfortable...not that the other would feel comfortable in his presence ever again.

 

When Sehyoon entered the police station he got greeted by people hurrying past him, shouting orders into their phones or studying documents in their hands. It was clear that they were in the middle of an investigation and nobody seemed to notice that the person, they were searching for, was standing right among them.

The only person that cared about his arrival was a young woman behind the counter at the entrance, giving him a questioning look.

"Is there something, I can help you with, Sir?" She asked and Sehyoon hesitantly walked closer.

"I'm searching for someone..." He said, not missing how the woman tucked some hair behind her ear, before she smiled at him. Sehyoon felt the urge to laugh. Would she still be interested in him, if she knew, he was a dangerous criminal? Probably not...

"His name is Kim Byeongkwan." She started typing something into her computer, probably a document that had to be filled in, when someone wanted to visit a police officer.

"And what is the reason, you are searching for him?" The woman wanted to know after having finished typing and once again smiled at him.

"I want to meet him. I'm the murderer, he is searching for." Sehyoon had to admit that it was satisfying to see the smile fade from the secretary's face. While she had tried to flirt with him before, her eyes were now growing huge and it was easy to see that she was scared.

"Oh my God..." She whispered and then hit a button under the desk that immediately turned on an alarm signal. An ear-deafening sound sounded and immediately all the attention was on Sehyoon and the secretary.

"It's him!" She screamed, while further backing away in panic. "It's the glitter murderer!" Sehyoon heard himself snort at this. Glitter murderer? Had they seriously been unable to come up with something better? However, in that moment someone grabbed him from behind, twisting his arms onto his back so that he yelped up in pain and dropped his bag to the floor.

"I got him!" The person announced – apparently a man – and Sehyoon could feel how he handcuffed him. Not that any of this had been necessarily. He hadn't even tried to fight back and why should he have come here if he didn't want to turn himself in anyways? The police were pretty dense indeed.

"What is going on?!" A voice suddenly interrupted the chaos and Sehyoon's heart ached in his chest even before he spotted him close to one of the doors.

When Byeongkwan's eyes fell on Sehyoon surprise flashed over his face which told the older that he hadn’t actually expected him to show up, before his expression turned into a stone mask that no longer showed any feelings at all. It was as if a stranger was standing there instead of the boy he still loved so much.

"This guy claims to be the glitter murderer." The man that was still holding Sehyoon explained.

"There are knifes in his bag! And even glitter!" Another man exclaimed who had opened Sehyoon's bag and he held up the knife with which he had killed the idol not too long ago. Byeongkwan came a bit closer and observed the evidences. Sehyoon tried to catch his eyes, to tell him how sorry he was about everything, but the other avoided his stare.

"Lock him up!" He eventually ordered, before he disappeared back through the door, not wasting another glance on Sehyoon who got dragged away to one of the prison cells.

 

* * *

 

 

The next days consisted of Sehyoon getting questioned again and again. At first, he had still hoped that Byeongkwan would show up at some point too, but soon he realized that he must have stepped down from the case. Still, Sehyoon answered every question with the truth, only withholding the information about how Byeongkwan had found him in the act of killing the guard and how he had ordered him to turn himself in.

It wasn't really important anyways. What counted was the fact that Sehyoon had killed 5 people, not including his father, but he wouldn't confess about that too. Sehyoon knew that this was already enough to get him into prison for the rest of his life, but his father didn't deserve to be pitied even a bit.

 

Days turned into weeks and his trial started. They had found enough evidences to convict him and the fact that he had also confessed made it even easier. He got sentenced to a life in prison but he didn't cry. Sehyoon only stared at the dark wood of the table in front of him, letting everything pass him by like it had these past weeks. He hadn't seen Byeongkwan since the day, he had turned himself in and it was as if the younger had taken everything that had made him human with him that day. What had stayed was a lifeless shell that functioned enough to walk, eat and answer questions.

Sehyoon should have probably known that his life would end up this way. He had been unlucky since the day on which he had been born into his broken family. Not that drowning in self-pity would somehow help him in in his current situation.

"Let's go!" His guard ordered, pulling him up from the uncomfortable wooden chair Sehyoon had been forced to sit on for the trials. This one had been his last. "It's time to move into your new home."

He didn't reply anything. He was used to getting cursed at or made fun of. People hated him but could he really blame them?

The guard guided him towards the exit of the courtroom, past all the people that had showed up to see him getting convicted and were now screaming stuff and curses at him, he didn’t listen to. For some reason Sehyoon had always hoped that Byeongkwan would at least be present for one his trials, that he still cared enough to see and hear what would happen to Sehyoon himself, but just like in the police station the younger had never appeared in front of his eyes.

"This way."

They left the room and walked towards the back entrance of the court, where the car that would bring him back to jail was already waiting for them. Sehyoon nodded to himself. This was only fair.

"Oh, Officer Kim." At the words of the guard the older's head immediately snapped up. There was no way that...

"I didn't expect you here." When Sehyoon met Byeongkwan's startled eyes it was as if the empty shell, he had become, suddenly got filled with life again. Only now he realized how cold the air on his skin was, how tight the handcuffs felt around his wrists and how much he had missed the younger.

"I...I only dropped by because of some documents for another case." Byeongkwan explained but at the way how he slightly shifted form one foot to the other Sehyoon knew that he was lying and for some reason it made his heart speed up. After all his hoping and praying had Byeongkwan indeed showed up for his final trial after all?

He tried to meet the other's eyes to find an answer to his silent question, but the younger kept his gaze firmly on the guard.

"Ahh well...it might interest you that they sentenced him to a life in prison. He finally gets what he deserves, doesn't he."

"Yeah..." Byeongkwan agreed and Sehyoon felt pain burning in his chest. Hearing him actually saying something like this hurt like a bitch. Finally, their eyes met for only a second and Sehyoon could see Byeongkwan gulp, before he quickly looked away again and cleared his throat.

"I should get going." He announced. "Work to do..." The guard said his goodbyes and Byeongkwan turned to leave, when suddenly the last bit of self-control left in Sehyoon vanished. All the emotions and the pain that had gathered behind a wall in his heart broke free and the thought that he would never see Byeongkwan again in his life and therefore would never be able to explain himself, opened in front of Sehyoon like a black hole. He knew that he couldn't let that happen. He knew that it would destroy him, destroy the good part, Byeongkwan had created inside of him.

"Help me..." It was only a whisper, but the younger stopped immediately.

"Help me." Sehyoon repeated his words but this time a bit louder. Slowly Byeongkwan turned back around, while the guard roughly grabbed his shoulder.

"He is not going to help you escape!" But Sehyoon ignored him, his whole attention was on the younger who, for the first time in what felt like an eternity, properly returned his stare.

"Help me..." He begged again and Byeongkwan frowned, a mix of pain and anger flickering in his eyes, before they went completely cold again.

"He is right...I'm the last person who would help you escape."

"That's...not what I meant..."

Byeongkwan's frown deepened, before he started to slightly pout in confusion. It was something he had always done without even noticing it and Sehyoon had always found it endearing. Seeing it again fueled the hope in him that the part of Byeongkwan that belonged to him was still somewhere inside of the younger. However, the guard seemed to have had enough.

"We're late!" He said, before he nodded at Byeongkwan one last time and started dragging Sehyoon towards the police car. While the older had simply accepted his fate before, he now tried everything to stay longer. He wasn't ready to part ways with Byeongkwan, at least not until he had made him understand. Therefore, he started fighting against the firm grip of his guard in the attempt of forcing him to stand still.

"Help me!" He screamed again, while the guards from the car ran over to them to help their collogue to keep Sehyoon in charge.

"Help me to escape the darkness...it's so close! It will get me!" By now tears had started streaming down Sehyoon’s face, while he looked at Byeongkwan with pleading eyes. The younger needed to understand that he was the only one who could still save him. Sehyoon wanted to tell him just that but with united strength the guards eventually managed to drag him out of the building and towards the car.

"Please! Byeongkwan, help me!" Were his last words, before they closed the door and made it unable for Byeongkwan to hear him any longer.

Meanwhile the younger stared after him with big, shocked eyes, clenching a small ring in his shaking hands. After the police car had disappeared, he quickly left too, managing to fight against his tears only until he had made it to a nearby park. There he sat down on one of the benches, not caring that he was still wearing his uniform and got funny looks from passers, while he helplessly broke down crying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took me so long but I struggled quite a bit with this chapter for some reason...so sorry...I could have done better I think :")
> 
> Anyways, one more chapter to go...better prepare yourself  
> sigh everything sucks...I'm so sad TT I want wowkwan fluff but where is that supposed to come from???? I hope you still enjoyed the chapter tho :")
> 
> See you soon~
> 
> My Twitter: [@Babbl1ng](https://twitter.com/Babbl1ng)^^


	5. Something to look forward to...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii...yess I'm alive and I'm back to finally finish this ff  
> Sorry that it took me so long. Also this is my first real update from China and I know, I've only been here two weeks but I feel like I haven't updated anything in an entire year so...
> 
> Also my updates will probably be even slower from now on because time is something, I don't have here at the moment :") I'm trying my best tho
> 
> Now enjoy the last part uwu

Weeks passed but to Sehyoon they felt like nothing. What did time mean, when there wasn’t anything to look forward to after it had passed?

 

At the beginning Sehyoon had still hoped. Just like he had waited for Byeongkwan to show up at his trial, he had waited for him to do the same in prison. But of course, that didn’t happen. Nobody visited him nor did he get any letters except from strange women that for some reason felt the urge to declared their undying love for him (not that he cared). After three months he eventually gave up. He stopped counting the days, stopped caring about how he looked like or anything else. The only thing that kept Sehyoon from ending it all and keep on eating instead was the tiny tiny part in him that was still hoping. However, even that part became smaller with every day.

 

It wasn’t like he was pitying himself. Sehyoon knew that he deserved to get punished. He had always known but he had never wanted for someone as innocent as Byeongkwan to get punished too...

He sighed, letting his eyes wander over the nearly empty yard. It was visitors day and most of his fellow convicts were busy talking to their family or friends.

They all were criminals like him that had done horrible things and still there were still people that cared about them...

He sighed again, stroking some hair out of his face. With time it had turned back to its original color and even though it wasn’t allowed, Sehyoon kept on growing it out. He knew that as soon as one of the guards would care enough about it, they would force him to get it cut, but right now it reminded him of the freedom, he had lost so long ago.

“Prisoner Kim?” A harsh voice suddenly interrupted his thoughts. Surprised Sehyoon looked up and into the face of one of the guards.

“Is it about my hair?” He asked, thinking about if it was worth running for, but the guard just frowned confused before he shook his head.

“We’ll take care of that later. Now you are needed in block A...There is a visitor for you.”

 

Sehyoon had stopped caring so long ago. There seemingly had been no feelings left in him and still, on the entire way to the visitor’s rooms, he felt his hands shaking and his heart beating unhealthily fast. Was this really it? Was this what he had waited and hoped for, for so long? And what should he do if that really was the case?

He took a deep, shaky breath to calm himself but it didn’t work. The last time, he had been this nervous had probably been on his and Byeongkwan’s third date, when he had planned on kissing the younger for the first time. Back then he had felt similar to now, even though in a more positive way and less like he wanted to throw up at any minute.

“There we are...don’t anything dumb or it will be your last visitor for a long time. Also, there are only 20 minutes left till visitor time ends, so better hurry.” Sehyoon nodded, not trusting his voice and the guard pat down his body, before he opened the door.

Suddenly the older felt the urge to run away. He didn’t know what was awaiting him in this room but he knew that he wasn’t ready for it... he would probably never be.

“What are you waiting for? Didn’t you listen, when I told you that visitor time is nearly up.” Annoyance mixed with panic washed through Sehyoon’s entire body but he kept silent. Then he gathered as much courage as possible and stepped into the small room.

 

Sehyoon had thought that the Byeongkwan in his memories was beautiful but seeing his face in front of him made him realize just how beautiful he really was. No imagination would be able to do him justice and, when the older locked eyes with his former boyfriend all the feelings, he had suppressed till now suddenly made their way to the surface and he felt how tears started gathering in his eyes.

Slowly and shaky he managed to walk to the other chair and sit down on it, feeling thankful that the hard wood was keeping his body from simply slumping down.

Then they stared at each other, while Sehyoon was feverishly searching for the right words to say. However, those seemed to not exist and therefore he simply kept silent.

“You look horrible...” Was the first thing Byeongkwan eventually said and the words, even though spoken quietly, cut through the silence like knifes.

“Meanwhile you...you look more beautiful than ever...” The reply had simply slipped out of his mouth and he immediately wished, he could take it back, even though it had been the truth. The younger ignored his interjection as if it hadn’t happened.

“I don’t like the beard...” Sehyoon frowned, before he slowly lifted one hand and touched his beard with his fingertips as if he only now realized that it was there.

“Mmmh...maybe I should shave...” He mumbled, now looking on his hands instead of Byeongkwan’s face. Again, there was silence, even though there were so many things, he needed to tell the younger and so many questions he wanted to ask.

Why did you come here? How are you doing? Do you eat enough? Did you miss me as much as I miss you? And most importantly;

“Do you hate me?” At his question Byeongkwan looked up surprised and their eyes met for a moment, before Sehyoon quickly looked away again. The silence that followed was worse than any silence, he had ever experienced and the urge to just run away returned. However, he didn’t and after some minutes the younger spoke up,

“You know...I tried hating you for a long time. I thought it was the only right thing to do, the only thing that would help me forget you but even after seeing you with your hands covered in blood, I still couldn’t feel anything else than anger about you doing such things and me still only seeing your good parts...” He paused to take a deep breath, before he continued,

“I hated myself more for still loving you than I could ever hate you... God even now I don’t hate you! However, that doesn’t mean, I’m not disgusted by the things, you’ve done... It’s so hard to understand...every day I just ask myself why? Why would you do something like this and why did you pull me into this mess too? Did you ever truly love me or was that also all just a game for you? Maybe to get information?”

 

Sehyoon felt his heart break at Byeongkwan’s accusation that he had only pretended to love him. If he could just show him how much he still loved him after all this time. But he couldn’t. The only thing, he could do was to give the younger the answers, he deserved.

“This probably sounds like a cliché from a movie and maybe you won’t even believe me but I’m promising that everything, I’m about to say is true...” Sehyoon took a deep breath and ran a hand through his messy hair, before he kept on talking;

“My childhood was hell. That’s the only way to describe it. The only tiny bit of light was my mother. While my father was a drug addict as well as a lawyer, we always pretended to be the perfect nice family on the outside but at home it couldn’t have been further away from that.

My mom hardly ever got outside. My father abused her too often...he probably didn’t want people to see the bruises or give her the chance to talk. Meanwhile, I was allowed to go to school but that didn’t mean I was safe from his anger issues... he simply beat me, where nobody would see. Till today I have no idea how they ended up like this...my mom being a helpless victim that for some reason had married my father who was an abusive asshole. Maybe they were simply born like this...” He stopped and hesitantly looked at Byeongkwan who stared at him with big eyes. Sehyoon had never told him about his parents. He had told him the same thing as everybody else; that they were dead and after all that was true.

“One day, when I was around ten, my father’s dealer got caught. That meant; no drugs until he would find another dealer but there weren’t any left to bridge that time. My father got angry...very angry...and somehow...I—I don’t know what happened, I wasn’t there, but he killed my mom...” His voice gave up and tears started filling his eyes at the memory. He had never talked about this with anyone before and finally saying those things aloud made him feel like he had back then.

“The only light in my life was gone...” His voice sounded raspy and weak and for one second Byeongkwan looked like he wanted to take his hand. However, he didn’t and the moment passed.

“After the death of my mom everything got even worse. Now I was the only one, he could beat up...but that’s wasn’t even the worst thing... There was an image and job to keep and since he was a lawyer with good connections and money, he used all of that to turn my mother’s death into an accident and him into the grieving, innocent husband... Nobody cares about the statement of a traumatized little boy and eventually my father broke me enough to make me lie for him...” Again, Sehyoon needed a pause, before he could continue, the memories too heavy to bare.

“That was, when I fully fell into the darkness... It was as if I couldn’t do anything about it...When I was seventeen, I killed my father and at that moment, when I looked at his dead body, I didn’t feel any guilt or sadness, no... For the first time in my entire life I felt free and powerful. He had made my mom and me suffer so much and I eventually made him pay for it. The problem was just...I couldn’t stop with just that. Suddenly I was the addict and I was addicted to feeling powerful so I—”

“You kept on murdering people...” Byeongkwan finished his sentence and Sehyoon nodded. It had been a dry statement of facts without any judgment or anger in it and the older was surprised that Byeongkwan hadn’t already left the room and gone home. Even after discovering the real monster, he was, the younger was still staying and Sehyoon didn’t know how to cope with that fact. Nobody deserved this boy.

“Continue...” the other’s emotionless voice pulled him back into reality and Sehyoon nodded, mainly to clear his own mind.

 

“I kept on murdering people... you know about the cases... at the same time I also studied to become a make-up artist... I’ve always loved make-up since I was young...” Only now that he was talking about his former job, he noticed how much he missed it. He missed using make-up nearly as much as he missed Byeongkwan but there would maybe never be a time again, where he could hold a brush in his hands and that thought made him sad.

“So at least that wasn’t a lie?” The younger asked, one eyebrow raised skeptically and Sehyoon quickly shook his head.

“No! Everything I told you was the truth! The Sehyoon you got to know was the real me he just...ended up on the wrong path...” At this Byeongkwan made a sound in between a snort and humorless laugher.

“You call murdering people the wrong path? That sounds like you only started smoking and drinking alcohol ...” This time Sehyoon was the one ignoring his interjection, because he had no idea what he should reply to that. After all the younger was right.

“The first time, I finally saw some light in my life again was, after I met you for the first time...” His voice wasn’t much louder than a whisper. He was too scared, Byeongkwan would leave after all and at the mentioning of their former relationship the younger indeed tensed.

“I know, you won’t believe me but I just want you to know that I’ve never loved anyone as much as you. When I saw you in that bar that night... it was like your smile was lighter than all the lights of the star and the moon combined. Suddenly there was no need for me to do bad things because the only thing that mattered was your happiness and you are the kindest human being, I’ve ever met...”

“Then why did you do it?” At the sound of Byeongkwan’s voice that had been so calm and emotionless before, but was full of pain and sadness now, Sehyoon looked up. The younger was staring at him, his eyes shining with tears, while his hands were clenched to fists on the table.

“Why did you have to destroy everything even though you had me?”

Now tears also started filling Sehyoon’s own eyes, because he had realized a long time ago that he didn’t know. There was no real reason. It had simply become something like a habit, just like him cleaning his make-up brushed every couple of weeks. However, even to Sehyoon that answer sounded horrible and therefore he just kept silent, while an expression appeared on Byeongkwan’s face that told him that he had figured it out by himself anyways.

The older was just about to open his mouth and say something to somehow comfort the other (not that he had any idea what to say), when suddenly the door got ripped open and one of the guards stepped inside.

“Time’s up!” He announced loudly and grabbed Sehyoon’s shoulder.

“Just one more minute!” He begged, not taking his eyes off Byeongkwan who had silently started crying. There were still so many things, he needed to tell the other. After all, he would probably never see him again.

“No.” The guard declined his request and roughly pulled him towards the door.

“Please!” Sehyoon begged again but it being without any use.

“Be happy! Find someone better than me and lead a happy life!” Was the last thing the older was able to shout at Byeongkwan, before metal separated them forever.

 

 

* * *

 

 

After Beyongkwan’s visit Sehyoon suddenly wasn’t able to not care anymore. He cared about how ugly he looked like with short hair, he cared about the bad food and how little freedom they had. People always said that it’s good to care but for the older everything had been easier, when he had not. Another problem that came with caring was that he now missed things agai. Right on top Byeongkwan of course, followed by his make-up of which he had no idea what had happened to it.

Then one day, two months later, a guard suddenly appeared in his cell with a package that looked clearly like it had already been ripped open and checked thoroughly.

“Someone sent a package for you.” The guard announced, for some reason looking extremely amused. “It was probably one of your crazy fans.” Sehyoon frowned confused and caught the package that the guard had simply thrown into his direction, before he left with a grin on his face.

The older really hoped that it wasn’t something too weird. Since his face had been made public, shortly before his first trial, he had suddenly found himself with an unexpected Fanclub consisting of women from all over the world that for some reason were convinced that they were in love with him. The fact that he had killed people didn’t seem to matter as long as he got the looks.

Sehyoon knew that these women probably needed psychologist help and therefore he had never answered even one letter. It would make everything only worse.

Over time some of his admirers had sent him the strangest things going from pictures of themselves and postcards to engagement rings, but never before had one of the guards grinned like this. It worried Sehyoon.

A bit scared, he carefully peeked into the package only for his mouth to drop open in surprise.

“What?” He whispered to himself and quickly emptied the content onto his bed. To light came several make-up brushes, a foundation and some other cremes plus an eyeshadow pallet. Sehyoon stared at it with unbelieving eyes, before he noticed the small piece of paper that had also been in the package. The message was short;

_“And you should keep on looking beautiful._  
Happy late Birthday!   
PS: Shave the beard.”

Sehyoon felt tears gather in his eyes, while a chuckle made its way out of his mouth. He didn’t need a name to know who had sent this package.

Of course, it wasn’t allowed to use make-up in his prison but, whenever he was alone in his cell, he put on as much as he wanted to and, when he looked at himself in his tiny mirror, Sehyoon finally felt something like happiness again.

 

* * *

 

“I heard it’s really cold here in winter so…” Awkwardly Byeongkwan pushed a green Christmas pullover towards Sehyoon who stared at it with surprised eyes. Soon a year would have passed since Byeongkwan had visited him for the first time. Since then Sehyoon had seen him three more times and now and then the younger had sent him small packages or letters.

At first, the tension between them had still been tense and uncomfortable but by now it sometimes nearly felt like in the past, when they had still been dating.

“Don’t tell me, you made this yourself.” Sehyoon said, not able to hide the amusement in his voice, while he had to think of all the corny movies Byeongkwan had always loved to watch back then. The younger just snorted.

“Of course not. Do you think, you would be able to wear it now, if I had? I would have probably forgotten the holes for your arms and head.” They both laughed and Sehyoon looked at his former boyfriend with fond eyes.

He had never expected to be allowed to see him smile like this again. Too much had happened that they weren’t able to simply ignore and the hard chairs, they were sitting on, and Sehyoon’s ugly prisoner uniform didn’t help either.

“How is work?” He wanted to know and Byeongkwan shrugged.

“The same as always…stressful. It’s pretty calm at the moment though. How about yours?”

“I’m actually getting better at it.” Sehyoon announced proudly. Because of the younger’s encouragements he had taken on a job as tailor in his prison and even though he had never been interested in that kind of stuff before, he found himself to enjoy the work. It distracted him from his situation and made him feel a bit more normal again instead.

“That’s great.” The younger said and smiled and Sehyoon returned it, happiness blooming in his stomach. However, the guards voice from outside destroyed their precious moment,

“Two more minutes!” The older sighed, while Byeongkwan started to nervously play with his scarf in his hands.

“Seems like we have to say goodbye again soon…”

“I started seeing someone again.” It suddenly broke out of the younger and Sehyoon looked up surprised, feeling how his heart sunk. However, instead of showing that he smiled, even though Byeongkwan was not looking at him and at his scarf instead.

“Really? Well…that’s…that’s great…”

“Yeah…it took me a while…My therapist told me that I have trust issues…I’m still scared my new boyfriend will turn out to be a criminal too.” Sehyoon chuckled softly since he had no idea how else to react.

“I’m sure, he won’t…”

“I hope so…”

“Have you told him about…me?” Sehyoon carefully asked after some seconds of silence and the younger shook his head.

“No…Not yet.”

“Well, I hope, you’ll become happy. You deserve it.” Finally, Byeongkwan looked up at the same time, the guard entered the room.

“Time’s up.”

“Okay.” Sehyoon said and slowly got up from his chair. However, in that moment he suddenly felt, how Byeongkwan grabbed his hand and he stopped in his tracks immediately.

“You deserve to be happy too!” He said, looking at him with intense eyes. “I…I know what you did but I can’t bear to see you unhappy. That’s something I’ve realized by now. Please…somehow…become happy too.” Sehyoon felt how tears filled his eyes and this time his smile was a real one. As if he could ever decline any of the younger’s wishes.

“I’ll try my best but…could you help me?” Byeongkwan pretended to think about this.

“We’ll see about that in two weeks.”

Then they had to let go of each other’s hands again but this time Sehyoon knew that he would see the younger again and that alone made him happy already. He finally had something to look forward to again.

 

**_The End._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this end sucks and I think some of you won't like it but I hope nobody who knows me expected them to run away together or something :") Sehyoon deserves to get punished point
> 
> This ff was so much fun to write and I hope it was just as much fun to read :) It's weird to finish another story especially here, where I mainly write, when I'm waiting for my hostchild or something. 
> 
> My brain feels kinda dead and idk what else to say :") I hope you enjoyed it and would like to read some of my other a.c.e fics uwu  
> Also I would be so damn happy about comments, feedback etc I'll try to reply to all of them soon but again at the moment that's a question of time but I'll read all of them promise!
> 
> You can also dm and follow me on twitter^^ (@Babbl1ng) Now that's it. 
> 
> BK and Sehyoon are on good terms...I'll just call it a happy ending^^ Byee guys~

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave your thoughts in the comments lmao or dm me on twitter [here](https://twitter.com/Babbl1ng) :")
> 
> I tried my best lmao and I had a really hard time bc Sehyoon is literally such a fluffy baby, I'm sad :(  
> I hope you still liked it tho <3
> 
> See you soon or at any of my many other works hahah :D
> 
> (This work will probably continue soon :))


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